Quiet Mind? Hardly!

I am a massive failure at meditation. Though, to be fair, I can’t say that I’ve worked all that hard at mastering it. Once a year, or so, I give it a try, maybe two. But every time I try, my brain literally starts racing out of control and it frustrates me so much that I take it as a sign that mediation just isn’t for me and throw in the towel.

My therapist is a little new age-y, which doesn’t bother me (I do live in California, after all!). So she recommends a version of meditation that she calls quiet mind. It involves envisioning a running stream and every time an unwanted thought invades, you picture putting the thought on a leaf and putting it in the water and watching it rush away downstream. I’m not much of a nature person, but I do love the water, so I like that imagery.

I’ve tried the quiet mind exercise a couple of times now, and so far, the results are pretty much in line with the historical precedent. My mind is anything but quiet. It leaps and races about in complete non-sequiturs that often leave me baffled as to how I got from one thought to another and what the possible connection could be that led me there. And it’s still pretty frustrating, but I’m going to give meditation another try this year, and make it a real fighting chance this time. Given that calm and balance is a big key for me in getting and keeping my eating under control, I’ve got to try every tool in the arsenal to stay on an even keel. Because my brain doesn’t need any encouragement at all to have me stewing over every worst case scenario or real or imagined slight or aggravation until the only thing that makes me feel better is a super-sized value meal, topped off with some cake.

And perhaps as a bit of synchronicity, it just so happens that this month’s issue of Yoga Journal magazine has an article on how to deal with the racing thoughts that are apparently very common among meditators, even the most accomplished among them. If nothing else, it’s comforting to know that this is a really common problem. And hopefully, I’m going to get some good tips that help me achieve “quiet mind.” Because after two weeks of vacation, I’m feeling pretty good right now. And before work gets back to its usual level of chaos, I’d like to get some tools under my belt that help me manage that stress much better than I have in the past. So, quiet mind, get ready, because here I come.